and I'm crying again....

It's that time of year again.  The time of year when the laughter stops, the fighting ceases and the little spark in our lives heads back to school. I really am crying again.  It seems absurd especially since its first grade.  I know, I know....I've done this already but I'm convinced I'm just lousy at change.  I love my crazy day to day life; both kids at home, yelling, running, giggling, flipping, hugging, snuggling, and playing.  I don't need anything to change.  I like everything just the way it is...but, nevertheless, here we are staring first grade right in the face.  I'm a mess and Amelia couldn't be more excited.  I mean, she has a new teacher....and "he's a boy." She's had her backpack packed for 2 weeks and her outfit is ironed and ready.  She's pumped, Mom is not. However, I must admit, it does make it easier knowing how much Amelia is looking forward to her new adventure.  So, Amelia, I write to you.....

My Amelia Rose,
Sweet, sweet girl, it's time for first grade!  You are so excited that I think you may pop.  You have a new teacher, Mr. Robinson and you absolutely loved meeting him.  You found out that several of your friends are in your class and I think that will make this year a breeze.  When we walked into orientation, all of the teachers remembered you.  They were so happy to see you.  Mrs. Scott hugged you for the longest time and told you to come to her room if you needed anything.  I could almost see the relief on your face.  I watched you walk down the hallway to your new room with your little ponytail rocking back and forth.  I tried to hold your hand as we walked up the stairs, but you let my hand go.   I don't know why it made me sad but it did.  Of course you don't need me to hold your hand as you walk up the stairs, but I just wanted you to need me or maybe I just needed you to hold MY hand.  It just made me realize how much you have grown up in a year.  You have gained so much confidence around your friends and teachers.  You are still as sweet as ever and funny, too!  You can read and write and sadly for dad and I , you can spell.;)  You are a great big sister and I credit you for teaching Maddox his colors and numbers.  I must say I am most proud of the love that you have for your family...I'm not just talking about me and Dad and Maddox.  I'm talking about the people you pray for every night...Granzy, Grandma, Grandpa, Matt, Dani, Tyler ,and GP.  If you can just continue to remember it really is all about family, then you are ahead of the game. You really are the best kid in the world.  So are you ready?  Heck yeah!  Knock em dead, Amelia.  Just remember, if you ever need anything in your life, big or small, night or day, Dad and I are here for you.  We love you and are proud of you and can't wait to see all the things you accomplish this year.